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Para fanáticos fundamentalistas del rock como yo, escuchar un cover de algún clásico suele ser una tortura, salvo honrosas excepciones (creo que "Whiskey in the Jar" tocado por Metallica es superior a la versión original de Thin Lizzy); pero existen auténticas mierdas que deben ser eliminadas de la existencia (junto con el Transantiago, Joaquín Lavín y la Universidad San Sebastián), cosas que molestan mas que una ampolla en el labio (si es mujer, es aplicable a los "otros" labios), y que las he extraido de las entrañas mas putrefactas de youtube. Escuchenlos bajo su propio riesgo:
- Imagine - John Lennon: ¿¡por qué demonios!?, John Lennon era un inconsecuente en muchos apsectos, pero no se merecía esto... un venezolano peor que Chavez que se hace llamar CachicamoConCaspa, ha violado por todos sus orificios a una de las mejores canciones que existe. Lennon debe estra todo fracturado luego de retorcerse tanto en su tumba.
- I Want to break free - Queen: Quizás esta canción ya no sea el símbolo de placer y libertad después de echar bencina en una estación shell (la verdadera sensación después de echar bencina es el dolor de bolsillo), pero filo, ya se murió Freddy Mercury, y a quien le importa Paul Rodgers, si tenemos a Los Yuntas, los verdaderos Queens chilenos.
- Hotel California - Eagles: una de las mejores canciones del siglo pasado ha sido víctima del lumpen argentino (unos metaflaytes llamados Bandi2, que mierda de nombre) han llevado el sacrilegio más allá de lo que hicieron los Gipsy Kings (sin comentarios) y la han infectado con sound, solo para estómagos furtes.
- Comfortably Numb - Pink Floyd: jamás pensé que un tema inmaculado, una joya del rock como esta canción podría ser ultrajada, violada y asesinada de forma tan cruel. Si yo fuera Roger Waters les dejaría caer el muro entero a estos electrogays de Scissor Sisters. Por el bien de la sociedad, sugiero no exponer los oidos mas de 2 o 3 segundos a esta mierda porque podríamos considerarla un método de tortura. Si no quiere seguir mis advertencias, sugiero traer algún recipiente para evitar que el vómito dañe el teclado, y si es mas sensible, un pañal.
No soy católico, pero creo que tendré que pagar por estos pecados, me voy a rezar.
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